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Although we may not realize it, when we converse with others we communicate by much more than words. By our expressions, gestures and other body movements we send messages to these around us a smile and an outstretched hand show welcome. A form is a sign of displeasure. Nodding one’s head means agreement—“Yes”. Waving an outstretched hand with open palm is the gesture for “goodbye”. Leaning back in one’s seat and yawning at a talk or lecture shows lack of interest, boredom. These gestures have come to be accepted in general as having the meanings mentioned, at last to Chinese and Americans. There are parts of the way in which we communicate. This “body language”, like our verbal language, is also a part of our culture.
In English-speaking countries, physical contact is generally avoided in conversation among ordinary friends or acquaintances. Merely touching someone may cause an unpleasant reaction. If one touches another person accidentally, he/she usually utters an apology such as “Sorry, Oh, I’m sorry, Excuse me.”
In China, a common complaint of western mothers is that Chinese often fondle their babies and very small children. Such behavior—whether touching, patting, hugging or kissing—can be quite embarrassing and awkward for the mothers. They know that no harm is meant, and that such gestures are merely signs of friendliness or affection, therefore they cannot openly show their displeasure. On the other hand, such actions in their own culture would be consid英语论文网 【http://www.51lunwen.org】ered rude, intrusive and offensive and could arouse a strong dislike and even repugnance. So the mothers often stand by and watch in awkward silence, with mixed emotions, even when the fondling is by Chinese friends or acquaintances.
Going beyond the milder forms of touching, we shall take up the matter of hugging and embracing in public. This practice is fairly common among women in many countries. And in most of the more industrialized countries, it occurs frequently between husband and wife and close members of the family when meeting after a period of absence. Hugging and embracing among men, however, is a different matter. Among Arabs, Russians, French, and in several of the east European and Mediterranean countries, a warm hug and a kiss on the cheeks are a standard way of welcome. The same is true with some Latin Americans. In East Asia and in the English-speaking countries, though, the practice is seldom seen. A simple handshake is the custom. The story is told of what happened not long ago when the Japanese prime minister at the time, Mr. Fukuda, went to the U.S. on a state visit. When he stepped out of his car in front of the white house, he was greeted by the American president whit a “bear hug”. The prime minister was flabbergasted; others of the Japanese delegation were amazed; many Americans were surprised—it was so unusual and so unexpected. If the president had bowed low in Japanese fashion, it would have been less a surprise than to be greeted in a way so un
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