common in either country!
The matter of physical contact between members of the same sex in English-speaking countries is a delicate one. Once past childhood, the holding of hands, or walking with an arm around another’s shoulder is not considered proper. The implication is homosexuality, and homosexuality generally arouses strong social disapproval in these countries.
3.1.3 Eye contact
Eye contact is an important aspect of body language. One could draw up quite a list of “rules” about eye contact: to look or not to look; when to look and how long to look; who and who not to look at. These passages from the book Body Language (Fast, 1971) are amusing as well as informative:
“Tow strangers seated across from each other in a railway dining car have the option of introducing themselves and facing a meal of inconsequential and perhaps boring talk, or ignoring each other and desperately trying to avoid each other’s glance. A writer, describing such a situation in an essay, wrote, ‘they re-read the menu, they fool with the cutlery, they inspect their own fingernails as if seeing them for the first time. Comes the inevitable moment when glances meet, but they meet only to shoot instantly away and out the window for an intent view of the passing scene.’ ”
He points out that with people who are unfamiliar:
“We must void staring at them, and yet we must also avoid ignoring them… We look at them long enough to make it quite clear that we see them, and then we immediately look 英语论文网 【http://www.51lunwen.org】away.
There are different formulas for the exchange of glances depending on where the meeting takes place. If you pass someone in the street you may eye the oncoming person till you are about eight feet apart, then you must look away as you pass. Before the eight-foot distance is reached, each will signal in which direction he will pass. This is done with a brief look in that direction. Each will veer slightly, and the passing is done smoothly.”
In conversations with people who know each other, however, American custom demands that there should be eye contact. This applies to both the speaker and the listener. For either one not to look at the other person could imply a number of things, among which are fear, contempt, uneasiness, guilt, indifference, even in public speaking there should be plenty of eye contact. For a speaker to “burry his nose in his manuscript”, to read a speech instead of looking at and talking to hid audience, as some Chinese speakers are in the habit of doing, would be regarded as inconsiderate and disrespectful.
In conversation, a person shows that he is listening by looking at the other person’s eyes or face. If the other person is speaking at some length, the listener will occasionally make sounds like “Hmm”, “Ummm”, or nod his head to indicate his attention. If he agrees with the speaker, he may nod or smile. If he disagrees or has some reservations, he may slant his head to one side, raise an eyebrow, have a quizzical look.
Staring at people or
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