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Personal Statement

Growing up on a military base for China’s People’s Liberation Army, the other children and I spent a lot of our time within the military compound. As a little girl, some of my most vivid memories included the my dad picking me up from the school, walking past the military cars, and my dad taking me to the river to let me pinch the mud along the riverside. By the river, I would chase the other children and throw clods of mud at the other kids whose fathers were also officers in the army.
My father was one of those officers in the PLA, and having the type of parent who spent his whole life in the military played a central role in molding my character. My father taught me to always have a plan, rules are to be strictly enforced, and that each person has strict responsibilities. According to his values, tardiness is unforgivable, trust should never be broken, and the family honor must never be tarnished. I took and upheld these values in the classroom, and I soon became known amongst my teachers as an ideal student that always did everything she was told. I took pride in this reputation, and I hoped that my father saw this and was secretly proud. If one combined the strictness of military life, and the conservative nature of Chinese culture, you would have a pretty good idea of daily life in my home. I never questioned my father. When he told me to concentrate on my math, I concentrated on my math. When he told me to come home before six, I came home at five-thirty.
When I first hinted to my father that I might be interested in studying in America, he said….nothing. Uneasy with the silence, I asked if he accepted the idea of me traveling so far from the family. Trying to counter any possible arguments, I promised I would work hard, avoid parties and drinking, and would not become “too American”. If I was expecting an answer from my father about studying abroad, I was not going to get it that day, or the next day.
One night, as I was studying in my room, lights off, but desktop lamp on, my mother came in and said she wanted to speak with me:
“Xiaoran, your father and I want you to get the best education possible, no matter where it is in the world. So, if you want to start applying to schools, you can. You know what kind of man your father is, and he doesn’t want you to go too far. He isn’t able to protect you if he can’t see you. However, you father and I made a decision: we are going to miss you, but we know an American education will help you reach your goals in life. You need to keep those promises you made to us, but ‘yes’ you can go.”
My father is not like the fathers I see on American TV shows, but I know without a doubt my father loves me. I might not have yet become the person I want to be in life, but my parents are giving me freedom to make my choices. Later, my dad spoke to me in person regarding this matter:
“I know you are not growing up in the same world I grew up in. Things are different now. What the world needs now is more people like you, not people like me who fight wars. Get your education in America, but come back soon and share what you have learned.”