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ent information to make informed decisions, understands all of the issues that must be addressed, knows the options that are available, and have thoroughly considered the risks and advantages of each option. If the mediator is to be effective, each party should feel personally comfortable with the mediator. After all, the mediator will be privy to the most intimate details of the parties' lives.

The right way to mediate is a contradiction in terms. There is no right way. Mediation is more a state of mind than it is specific skills. There is certain skills and strategies that can be developed, issues to be addressed in order to assure decisions made by the parties are informed and voluntary. It is thought that a mediator is humanistic, compassionate, patient and an empathetic listener and that qualifications and Myers-Briggs testing are important. But there is another ‘school of thought’ that natural mediators who rely on gut instinct and natural inquiry are more appropriate. Important attributes for such a mediator are seen as:

Confused. This trait is one of sitting on the fence, Recognising there are no easy answers, heroes can be scoundrels and victims can be perpetrators. It’s never easy or clear.

Voyeuristic. This is associated with a fascination with how human beings engage with each other, construct their realities and pursue their intimate relations. This trait allows a greater ability to resist being judgemental.

Compulsive. These mediators have a penchant for bringing order out of chaos. They recognise that conflict is less about allocation of resources and more about people being overwhelmed, fearful of being taken advantage of made look a fool.

Marginal. Mediators are not aligned with any cause or purpose other than to help the parties make decisions for themselves. Mediation is not about social justice.

(Source: Benjamin, The Natural Mediator, 1998)

Mediators sometimes have unrealistic and artificial expectations of what they should be to clients. It’s best to recognise this in mediation and use our basic nature and to harness the above attributes and vulnerabilities to our advantage.

Applying the Mediation Process to a dispute

This dispute concerned an allegation of workplace bullying and harassment due to performance management issue between an employee and his supervisor. Particular emphasis was placed on exploring options for resolution which focused on the future relationship of the parties i.e. the working relationship needed to be preserved. The neutral mediator appointed was neither a decision-maker nor an expert advisor.

The Company mediation process (as it was conducted) undertook 4 distinct stages:

Preparation

Hearing the Stories

Developing options

Reaching agreement

During the preparation stage the mediator met with and greeted the parties, explained the process, gained agreement on ground rules, answered any questions and looked for a willingness to engage.

In hearing the stories both employees were allowed to talk in turn and both listened. The mediator asked questions with a view to clarifying issues between them. He then asked if both understood each others issues (but not necessarily agreed). There was then a joint identification of the issues.

In developing